What a mess for Sir Paul. As if he hasn't been through enough during his past sixty plus years of life. There are those who would say he's had it all: fame, knighting, great marriage, great kids, death of friends and first wife -- and, now this. His newly estranged wife, Lady Heather, who doesn't even have the right to use that moniker, is not only a partial amputee, she's a bleeding porn star from back in the day. Did he know about it? Well, in looking back, his public statements denied these images were anything more than jealous fans trying to besmirch his lady's name. HAH! Apparently, that's not so true. Our bleeding heart liberal who campaigns for every charity under the sun, has a sordid past and now it's out in the open for all to see, for you to see AND share amongst your friends. We doubt Sir Paul is in a hurry to face the world and its 'we-told-you-so' gloaters. He remains hidden away at his Sussex farmhouse, where he has been staying since announcing that he and the tramp are to separate. Sources report that he's depressed and unhappy, consumed by anguish and regret. The big question remains: Why DID our Paul marry this woman? We're sure he feels like a prise idiot; but, the one thing he can't say was that he wasn't warned. He was; and, it becomes more awful by the day. In his worst nightmares, it is unlikely that he could have envisioned what's been emerging in the tabloids. Hell, they can't print this smut fast enough. What's worse, is it's all true. Did we mention we've got the goods on the oh-so-pure Heather? Yep. We do.

Pictures of a young and virtually naked Heather Mills, displayed for all to see, depicting what is often described as 'steamy clinches' under a shower with a man, who is also half-naked. Oh, to be sure, there is more. In one she is wearing handcuffs, in another she is smearing baby oil on the man. A third, almost comical image, shows the male porn star popping a strawberry into Heather's mouth with his tongue. Strawberry Fields Forever, the song, was thought to be about drugs. Now, it takes on a new and dark symbolism. We're sure Paul will never listen to that song again, as he imagines his almost ex exchanging strawberries and spit with others for the camera. Juicy, isn't it? And, what's with the bondage scenes? There have long been rumours that Lady McCartney's past was rather murky, but even her worst detractors have never suggested she was involved in hardcore pornography. So febrile are the rumours now circulating around the couple that yesterday it was even suggested a group of people close to McCartney - unbeknownst to him - had hired a private investigator to check out Heather's background. Could such a drastic action really be true? Well, her lawyers have finally admitted that she had taken part in erotic shoots, which, by the way, we have for you to see and savour. They, of course, deny it's porn. We leave that up to you to decide. They state: 'This photo shoot, undertaken approximately 20 years ago, was for the purpose of a 'lovers' guide" to caring relationships and instructive sex in the same way as are many other books on the market," her lawyers Coyle White Devine said. "The photo shoot was not pornographic or for the purposes of gratification of the viewer.' -- If you believe that, we've got bridges and desert land to sell you. Until the facts smacked Paul squarely in the face, he actually believed her when she said the stories about her past were rubbish. Well, not so anymore. This is a man who did not insist upon a pre nuptial agreement. Can you do the math? He's about to go through the bloodiest divorce in the history of mankind, being worth over a billion dollars. Paul says the gloves are off and we predict this divorce is going to be a tough one. Think this new exposure will help him lessen her settlement? Perhaps if he offers her a substantial amount of money to mollify her and make Heather go away, preferably back into the dark shadows of her past, she WILL go away. At least, that's what his daughter, Stella, is advising. Who knows, though? Our interests, and we're sure yours, lie in the sordid, sexuality that is rising to the surface. Heather has enough worries. She rather enjoyed the 'royal' treatment she was receiving as the wife of a SIR. Now, rumour has it that she's totally stopped reading the papers. Does she really want to read about how she performed a sex act on a naked porn star? Or how he was photographed performing a sex act on her with the help of a sex toy? Does she wish to remember the bondage-type shots featuring whips, handcuffs and edible underwear, or those which show her appearing to have sex with the man in front of a mirror? Of course, rumours did surface about Miss Mills McCartney's unsavoury past when she first started dating the former Beatle, who is 26 years older than her. It prompted her to give an interview denying she had been a "high-class hooker" who was flown to lavish parties around the world to sleep with rich businessmen. She also denied she had slept with billionaire arms dealer Adnan Khashoggi and Harrods boss Mohamed Al Fayed. "At every turn I'm being told of vile allegations and lies against me," she said in the June 2000 interview. "These slurs are so awful that they are stopping people supporting my charities. If they think I'm a former hooker, they don't want to be linked to me. "I sat down with Paul as soon as I heard the lies that were coming out. I talked him through it step by step. "I can't tell you how he reacted because that is too private - but he knew how ludicrous it was. It is all so pathetic and revolting, but Paul never doubted me for a moment."

Sadly, that's no longer the case. Not only does he doubt her, we all know she did it. And, did it well, judging by the pics. Damn, those pics do show it all. Maybe Sir Paul turned a blind eye to his wife's 'colourful' past, but we guarantee that you won't. We sure didn't. To sum up the character of Heather McCartney, we've got a woman who has a wild spirit, is possibly a former hooker for wealthy men, half of one leg as a result of a motorcycle accident in '93, and the best of all --porn pictures galore for you to see. See them you shall because they are here for you, in all of her nakedness. This is one press she cannot deny, because, in this case, a picture IS worth a thousand words and we've got all of them! Get 'em while they're hot!